Last night I dreamt about surfing.

Um, not ready to take a dip in that cold water. You can forget it. There is no way. BRRRRR. Heck, I get cold in my own hot tub.

Switching gears.

I’m painting a bedroom, bathroom and cutting in (Doing the edgework before I fill in the middle) on a kitchen tonight if anyone cares to join me. Hopefully, I’m done by 9:30. I also have to paint the risers on the stairway. GRRRRR….

Wouldn’t it be nice if renting houses was all about sitting back and collecting the rent? I have a new tenant coming Feb 15^th for one of my 2 vacancies. I have to fix the other house and have it ready to show by the last week of February. It is almost ready but I have had to paint the entire thing. I also have to refinish the bedroom floor and the hallway floor.

I am grateful to have them I suppose.

Changing gears.

The Superbowl party we had was a success. I set out a projector, a blow up screen and PA system in the clubhouse. Everyone brought a covered dish and their own beverages and we watched the game on a monster sized screen. Since I didn’t have a horse in the race I was rooting for New Orleans.

Next Gear.

I need a vacation. Like, I need to check out for two weeks kind of vacation. I haven’t taken a real vacation since 2008. Yes, I know I live at the beach and vacation/weekend by the beach but it isn’t exactly the same as a long vacation.

I have dreams of driving all over the country and stopping whenever I feel like it. I’m going to make it a reality someday sooner than later.

I’m not getting any younger.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

Bullet points.

If our lives were only a myriad of bullet points things would be so much easier. As we all know, life is never *easy*.

1)      Bought gas today at Shell and some lady was berating/cussing/ screaming at her two year old kid. She was wearing a black top and her belly was sticking out like a busted biscuit can. Ironically, her shirt had some script across the top that said “Classy”. That could not have been her shirt. I hate abuse even more than I hate racism…I told the lady to “take it easy” on the kid.  She sneered at me.

2)      I never was any good at jokes with sexual overtones. Oh, I like women an awful lot (understatement of the century) but making innuendo is not my style.

3)      I am so damn deaf in my right ear that I have taken to reading lips. It is worse than I let on although everyone that knows me is on to me big time.

4)      I *really* have an Inner circle of friends. I call them the “Board of Directors for my life”. There have been many discussions and recommendations by the board over the last several months. I am going to roll out many of these initiatives very soon. I’m excited and I am afraid. Stay tuned.

5)      My leadership style? Apparently, I am a benevolent dictator. Interesting revelation. I have always known this….

6)      I have been sitting in with all kinds of bands trying to amass a list of other musicians in the area. In reality I’m trying to steal a legitimate singer from another band. I can sing well but am looking for someone spectacular to replace my daughter. Not happening. My instrument of expression is the guitar.  

7)      My daughter must call or text me at least 10 times a day or more….My exchange student is almost as bad.

      I’m tired of all you (fill in the blank) M*ther****ers stealing my toothpaste. Get your own!!!

9)      Every spare minute of this weekend will be spent working on my vacant rental. GRRRRRRR!!!! Caulking, painting and refinishing floors…

10)  I’m negotiating a deal on a quadplex and if the spreads work I’m going to buy it. That would give me nine rentals. My goal is to have 18-25 of them. At that point it becomes a full time job. Perhaps I’ll pass it along to my daughter.

Let’s see. We have a party tonight at the clubhouse. We have a Superbowl party on Sunday. I sure hope I get my work done…

My plate is full. Wish you could join us.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

Sugar and Spice made a post about her cousin and their current marital situation. Obviously, there is no right or wrong answer. I have met folks who “Got away” with it and I have known folks who got caught.

I am not in the business of judging any of you who have been or are caught or are having an affair because in the end you are all probably looking for happiness in some form or fashion.

Temptation is an age old thing that we all had to suffer. Me? Oh I get tempted but always run like hell from it before anything remotely gets close.  I have never regretted it although the human in me wonders what it would have been like in retrospect.

The same answer applies.

NEVER worth it. I would never find anyone prettier (for me) smarter or more loving. I know it.  I absolutely know it because I have considered all the options in the past.

I am including an excerpt from what I said to little Miss Spice.  Here it is:

Cheating is an unfortunate and common problem. The root of the issue is very personal. On one hand you feel a sense of loyalty to your cousin but on the other hand you don’t want to unleash the dogs of war.

1) The risk of outing them has some serious consequences. Lets say you out him and they reconcile. Ultimately, you turn out to be the bad guy.

2) If she is in your closest most inner circle of family or friends (Someone you would stop bullets for) then it is your obligation to lay that cheating man to waste immediately despite the consequences. This is the kind of action generally reserved for your best lifetime friend, mom, dad, sister etc…

3) You could secretly drop the bomb which is passive aggressive. It may cause more heartache than it is worth. At the end of the day you probabably won’t feel good about this action because you love your cousin.

4) You do nothing and feel pretty terrible about it because in a perfect world you could fix it.

5) Most important. WHATEVER you do, you cannot speak negatively of this man to anyone as it has a way of coming back and biting you in the tail. Your expression of hope that they work it out should always be first and foremost in any conversation. These thoughts will protect your relationship with your cousin. You must be positive even in the face of this mess.

Having said all of that you must realize it simply is what it is and you cannot change their fate.

It just depends on where she is in your inner circle. Only you have the answer to what your best course of action will be. 
 
You have a burden to carry. Now that you have shared it, we can help you lighten the load.

I’m sending you and those you love my very best wishes.

Love,
Bobby

I love my litte sister. I absolutely adore the little girl.  She isn’t a kid by any stretch of the imagination but you have to understand, she is 31 and I am almost 46.

I remember her when she ran around in diapers. Lord have mercy, she followed me everywhere I went.

One of the nice things about the chick is that she isn’t much of one for small talk and or drama. You must be asking if she is normal and sometimes I scratch my head wondering why she doesn’t talk much.  When she speaks, people listen.  Our leadership styles are different. 

Perhaps a few of you will recall a post about my sister gaining a hell of a lot more weight than I ever dreamed possible.  When I see her picture now it immediately evokes a response such as *”HOLY S**T” and so forth. Just being honest. Nobody and I mean nobody really wants to gain that kind of weight. Her husband (I am closer to him than my own brother) has packed it on too.

Anyhow, she sends me a text message that she is going running with Jason and that they intend on doing a mile. I tell her that they should start slow and run/walk for time (like for 30 minutes) and all that other training mumbo jumbo stuff..Not old hard head. One mile…..gonna do it again tonight.

The coach in me wants to improve her training and the human being in me also tells me to keep positive even if it makes my eyes roll back into their sockets.

The bottom line is I don’t want them to be frustrated by slow results, injuries or burnout.

I’ll come back and finish in a little bit…

Peace,

Bobby

Once upon a time I was on top of posting and reading journals like a wildman. A little over a year later and you pretty much see me out to pasture with all the other old race horses. I still like writing but with the nature of my job and everything else I’m lucky to put my boxers on with the tag in the back.

I will update you in bullet points.

1) Broke the right front end off my golf cart last Thursday right after we brought it back from jumping “sand ledges” at the beach.  Cold, fun and then *POW*!!! Thank Science it decided to give out once we made it off the beach. Riding on the beach is not permitted. WHOOPS!!!! Me and my buddy had to put the front left tire on a skateboard and back it to my house. Took us all of 40 minutes.

2) Sold my jetski. Yep, got a buyer in this weather. I’m over it and so off it goes. It was in perfect shape so I got 6200 bucks back out of it. I paid 9500 over 3 seasons ago.  I may buy another one or I may simply sit this season out and concentrate on my surfing a little more.  It was time. These things are more work than simply getting on and riding. I want to do something else this summer.

3) I have many kinds of business deals in the works.  All of them are so damn time consuming it isn’t funny. This latest round is in the quiet period but if things go well I’m going to be even more busy and better for it. You will know directly. When I say huge, I mean huge for me and my family. I’m anxious to get going.

4) I just got hit with 2 notices that Two of my 5 tenants are moving in February. The good news? I’m showing one of the houses this week and will probably get an extra 45 bucks a month in rent. The bad news? The next house has been neglected by the tenant and she is NOT getting her deposit back. This means I am working on the property for a month until I can rent it again.  I imagine I’ll get an extra 20 or so bucks a month rent once it is fixed up.  Nothing says lovely like working on a house in freezing weather.

5) College tuition time!!! Hooray!!! Barf up the dough for Kelly and Barf up the dough for Nurse ratchet. Kelly has turned out to be a fantastic young lady. Mabel? Almost a doc. Summer after this one and she will officially be a Doctor of Nursing Practice.  Me? I’m still retarded…

6) I have been skiing and snow tubing once this season and I may go again. Our mountain house is quaint and the scenery is beautiful. I have designs of retiring up there. What? Oh hell no, the beach isn’t anywhere close….

7) True story. I’m so stressed out and anxious that my friends and family are secretly calling and checking up on me. I run, swim, workout and play guitar often when I get like this so you can only imagine I’m all over the place when I’m not working. I told my buddy at work if I have a heart attack to shut the door and simply let me go in peace….I was half kidding but the other half thought it to be pretty sound advice.

I’m not entirely wrapped up too tight. Any good juju passed this way would be greatly appreciated. I don’t know how I’ll ever pay you back other than to say I will help my fellow man if given the opportunity and resources to do so.

When I get home its a flip of the coin, I’m either running for an hour or swimming laps for an hour.

Then its back to work till 11pm…

Peace be with you,

Bobby

I love the way my folks (see father/brother/ex sister-in-law)  talk about being “Sick”.  Oh, I can’t do this or that because *I’m sick* kind of speech. Absolute BeeeEsss.

Mind you I have been sick. Sick and tired doesn’t care if you are sick or tired.

I know exactly what it is like. I get sick and tired and you know what? The world doesn’t care.

Pretty cruel but consistent I think.

Do you think when one of my tenants calls me because his heater won’t work cares if I’m sick? Hell no.  Do you think my clients care if I’m sick and we have to do some business? Hell no.  Do you think my soccer team will halt the game because their coach is sick? Hell no.

The truth? Ahhh the truth….You are as good as your last at bat.  Nobody cares about your efforts boy.

The world measures you based on the results of your efforts. Nothing more and nothing less.

We all know this instinctively. Think not? Think again. Did you eat today? You are on the right path….Fail to take care of yourself and you will turn to dust.

Kelly: Daddy, does the world fight fair?
Me: Are you kidding? Absolutely not….

How about some words of wisdom little one? When you fight you must win by whatever means necessary. Protect yourself at all times. Learn by observing the mistakes of others.

Don’t make excuses. Accept responsibility. You either did something or you did not. There is no middle ground.

Adopt this attitude and when you look at yourself in the mirror you will never have to make excuses.

Oh and another thing…Don’t ever let the world know you are sick. Its a disaster.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

Christmas was fantastic. Literally, we didn’t leave the house all day. We just opened the doors and a sea of humanity kept pouring into our home. I wasn’t stressed and never worried about any kind of timeline.

Wonderful!

Saturday we went to a wedding.  Kinda weird watching a wedding where both parties have been married  to other folks twice before. Me personally? I will only marry once. I married the love of my life and whatever happens is whatever happens. Anyhow, it was lovely as these “society” weddings usually are. *whew*…

Sunday? Busch Gardens baby.  I got to ride the Griffon for the first time and liked it so much we rode it twice more. Seriously, Busch Gardens decorated the place and made it absolutely gorgeous. I just had to get a little bit more of the “Christmas Spirit”. I will post pics soon I promise.

This week? Hmmm, finishing up on our year end business. I think we are going to spend the weekend at the mountain house as it appears to be one filled with FRESH SNOW.  We should be able to do some skiing and or snow tubing. Our exchange student (Jovana) is not remotely athletic so perhaps we will snow tube it just to make her more comfortable.  We will see.

While I see many changes in store for us for 2010; I do not have any personal resolutions.  I do have goals. I expect 2010 to be a breakout year for us in a myriad of ways. Getting ready as we speak…

Stay Tuned.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

All is quiet this morning.  I got out of bed a little later than usual. I was immediately greeted by my dog Harvey and my Cat Fiona.  Both of them wanted to eat and go outside.

Everyone else was asleep of course. I am always the first one out of bed. Generally speaking, I use this time to reflect on my day and read the news.

This morning I thought of Christmas Past. I remember the excitement of visiting my Grandparents. My cousin was always there and he remains my oldest and dearest friend. We are both 45 now. I can remember a day when we believed in Santa Claus and were filled to the brim with anticipation of Christmas morning.

My Grandparents have long since passed.  I miss them terribly.

I have read somewhere that “Time heals all wounds”.  I’m here to tell you that concept is a bunch of hooey.  In reality if you truly love someone and you lose them; you are going to always carry a piece of that person in your heart.  A part of your heart always goes with them as well.

You never fully recover. The scar never fully heals.

That is the price you pay for love.  For me, this is the only way I know how to live.

Merry Christmas,

Bobby

The Spirit of Christmas

As a child my father had no real desire to do anything for Christmas. He never thought enough about anyone to go shopping for presents. He certainly wasn’t going to wrap gifts if he did buy anything. He remains this way till this very day.

Thank science for my Grandfather. He was the Alpha and Omega of my Christmas experiences as a child. I looked forward to staying with my Grandparents over the holiday. They knew how to celebrate the holiday in style! Unfortunately, my Granddaddy was called to the next dimension before I turned 12.

He died right before Christmas. A massive heart attack took him out on the very first attempt.

You may catch glimpses of granddaddy through me when you read this journal. He was a wonderful human being. I miss him awful. This feeling comes over me especially hard over the Christmas holiday.

Changing of the guard.

Nothing says dysfunctional “Christmas” like having my father at the helm. Did he forget my mother at Christmas? Yes. How about her birthday? Oh yes. Our birthday? Forget about it.

OMG!! What a nightmare. It’s nice to know that none of us were special.

You see, my father is intelligent. He can be thoughtful and he could easily have made a difference. He just can’t see past himself. It’s a shame to go through life and not be committed to anything. Fortunately, he was/is not a physically abusive person.  

Such is my father. What else could he possibly do to stick a dagger in our hearts? Well…He packed up my mother and they moved to Florida.

Do we have family in Florida? No. Crush us all….

In the spirit of Christmas I have long forgiven my father. Oh, he is still the same. I just accept him for who he is.

I am also grateful that I did not become my father.

Perhaps this is the best Christmas gift of all….

Peace be with you,

Bobby

You gotta watch the drinking in my neighborhood. My recollection of college compares directly to the drinking that goes on in my hood.

Last Friday? Big party and we didn’t get home till 2am. I had two beers the whole night. Pretty good considering I was once ranked #3 on the neighborhood drinking poll.

Saturday? 200 Trick-or-treaters. I got visits from Spiderman, witches, Mario and a bunch of little faries…You need a second mortgage to pay for all the bloody candy. Ratchet told me she spent 65 bucks and ALL the candy is gone!!! Oh We went to 3 parties after 8. Another 2am kind of night…My house was the first stop!!!

Sunday? Brunch with all the local politicians. Did they serve mimosas and Bloody Mary’s? Uh, yes. I confess I did have one. Thank Science it rained all day….We later had family over for dinner.

Monday? Monday Night football and yes we have a fantasy league in the hood. I skipped the gathering. I can’t be doing this all the time ya know?

Tuesday? Ah, that was election night. We watched the results at campaign Headquarters and then went back to the Sheriffs house for a big party. Mabel said Dirty Martini more than once and regretted it the next day.

Wednesday? Williamsburg baby!!!

Thursday? That would be tonight. Um, I’m sure I’ll go extreme golf carting with a gathering to follow at one of the local watering holes….Thirsty Thursday seems to be the new favorite of the week for all the residents (see neighborhood idiots).

Friday? Live music up at the clubhouse. The alcohol is flowing and fresh. I ain’t drinking but I bet I play a song or two…

Saturday? Hmmm, gotta work on the rental house and then go an oyster roast. I am not fond of oysters unless they are raw. Make that an oyster roast with several kegs of beer. Nuts!!!

Sunday? I can’t think that far ahead. I’m sure something stupid will happen. The text messages will start about 9am and die down in the evening.

I have been very successful in slowing my drinking to 3 or 4 beers a week. I just want to point out that it is a path I walk almost entirely alone…..

Whats the weirdest part? Hmmmm, I often feel so very alone and isolated in the midst of all these folks.

Seasonal depression is a real bear for me. Fall and winter are not my friends.

Drinking makes it worse so I have vowed to stay sober.

Welcome to my world…

Peace,

Bobby