It was early Saturday morning (Feb 6^th) on the way back from work. Chris worked all day and all night (We have been hammered with snow and ice) restoring high voltage power lines and was on his way back home when he hit a patch of ice on the interstate. His truck spun wildly out of control, fell into a ravine and abruptly stopped after hitting a tree.

I suppose he was speeding. He liked to do that you know….

He died on the scene.

Chris leaves behind his wife and children.

I have known Chris all of his life. I don’t know what else to say.

That hurt.  

I think I’m done with this post.

Peace,

Bobby

Bullet points.

This could be short or could be long. I don’t know.

1)      Racism. I‘ve seen some discussion on the subject in KCL. All it takes is one human being who is different than another and BOOM you have potential for conflict. Education is the only way to solve racism.

2)      Straight A’s continue for Jovana, our exchange student. The kid should be an engineer. Unfortunately, they have no use for Engineers in her country. Engineers, Physicians and Lawyers are not well paid in Montenegro.

3)      Kelly has been pounded with snow these last couple of weeks. Friday and Saturday they are getting 15-26 inches of snow after having snow all week up in DC. Folks, we are from the beach where the snow never goes…It has officially freaked her out.

4)      Me? Oh I have completely lost my mind. I had two rentals come vacant at the end of January. One is rented already (Wonderful turn around and picked up 45 more bucks a month in rents.) The other? I should have it ready to show in the next two weeks. Those folks were not the cleanest humans on the planet. I will pick up an extra 45.00 bucks in rent there as well. Lots of work. Many long nights!!!

5)      Nurse Ratchet? Um, her mentor and old physician co-worker passed away suddenly about 2 weeks ago. He died of a massive heart attack. They worked together the day before he passed. She has cried everyday since. Not pretty. Actually, I have never seen her depressed. She is CRUSHED.

6)      My brother is working with one of the producers of Lady GaGa on some music tracks. They both went to Berklee together. Frankly, this is his big break. The downside? My brother is a monster in the studio. In fact, he has his own studio in his house. Killer. We are having a divorce party for him on the 8^th!!! It is official.

7)      My little sister? I love her. She is just back from a business trip to Atlantic City. She was excited. Me? You can keep Atlantic City. She has already fallen off the wagon on her running and diet.

      Hopefully, I can fix my golf cart tonight or tomorrow. I snapped a strut off jumping some dunes awhile back. Were we out of control? Yes. Was it fun? That cart should be outlawed.

9)      Superbowl? I see the Saints winning it unless Peyton Manning gets red hot.

10)  I miss you all very much. I still read you but have not logged on to comment or write. I think that status will be consistent for awhile.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

My biggest job?  Years ago, I once thought that my job was to work as hard as I can and make lots of money.  I enjoyed my youth and have few regrets about what I have done with it.

I didn’t realize at the tender age of 23 that being a husband was such an important job. I guess I forgot to read the memo.  Balancing your friends, family, wife and career certainly was and continues to be a labor of love.

I was 26, almost 27 when I learned what love was really all about. Having a child come into the world is an overwhelming emotion. I was the first of the family to hold my daughter and to this very day I am the favorite.

Speak of favorite; that is another title I hold near and dear to my heart. I have and will continue to be many an athlete’s favorite coach.  I am my niece’s favorite uncle.  All the Serbs that stay with us will tell you straight away that I am the favorite.  I am my sister’s favorite family member. I am my father’s favorite son. I am my wife and daughter’s favorite human being.  I am my brother’s favorite sibling as well.

One could go an entire lifetime and never be a favorite.

I suppose I have countless friends who think of me in this way.  I don’t have to ask. I already know.

I am loved. No chance I’ll ever be a failure.

There are many of you who may perceive this post as being boastful.

I can assure you that bragging is not the purpose of this message.

To have love in your life you must take considerable risks.  Look for the goodness in people and expect the very best. You will never be perfect. Don’t worry about perfect. Just be sincere.

Will you get hurt along the way? Oh yes. Love can be painful. Just have a loved one die on you and this pain will become real in a hurry.

I can’t dwell on the inevitable. I can only enjoy today. I have no idea what tomorrow brings.

For now, I am happy to count my blessings.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

Holy Cow.

What a night! There are many parts of my city that are still flooded.

I think peak winds hit us around 75 miles an hour and we had tidal surges that covered all the streets leading away from our Peninsula.  Our tidal surges in other words made the water levels rise seven feet above mean high tide. The water came up to the dunes!!!

I live 16 feet above sea level. I’m okay.  There are several places in this area where your house is barely above sea level. I think I lost a privacy fence at one of my rentals. I have to check it later this evening. My problems are nothing.

My house had a leak coming across the garage floor slab that goes to our mechanical room, mudroom and garage. We worked on that issue from 3pm till 1am. 

I’m happy to report we kept the water from flooding this area but it was a LOT of work.  No house is waterproof and heavy winds blowing rain against your house will force water to seek its lowest level.

I am lucky.

There are multitudes of people who lost their homes. I’m sure the damage is incredible. I saw several boats above the piers by my home for instance. Not pretty.

Emergency services made several rescues and we are still assessing the damage. As in they had to go fetch people out of their homes by boat!!!

Gonna be a long weekend. I have lots to do and plenty of neighbors to help.

Peace,

Bobby

Crazy stuff that goes through my mind…

I have to bite my tongue when someone doubts my playing ability on the guitar before I start. The doubts fade right around 10 seconds into my playing.

The macho code. Truth be told I am always quite spooked by sharks in the water when we surf. Big turtles and dolphins have startled the hell out of me too.

I still don’t understand hair transplant surgery on a dude. Vanity in men just makes me wonder.

I still feel like my Z is brand new after almost 7 years. I can’t describe my connection to that car. I have a similar connection to my Toyota FJ Cruiser.

My brother isn’t going to work out in our band. He has the talent but doesn’t have the drive.

I don’t miss drinking.

My friends and family are all worried about me. Some quietly, some openly. Perhaps I have retreated into my own little world.

I have dreams about buying a sailboat and traveling to the Carribean. I am actively looking for a big sailboat that will handle it.

I need to get pro access. I better find a box to send this hot sauce to Matt with my money while I’m at it…

I have to go to Williamsburg tonight. My “coach” has an office there. I’m so damn paranoid that my peers would know so I travel pretty far to keep it under wraps. It has never been a secret in this space.

I have depression issues when my beloved summer turns to fall.

Here is a paradox. I am very social and friendly. Underneath all of it I am a loner and would be comfortable alone for weeks at a time. That will never happen.

I haven’t slept well in months.

I am human. I’m not perfect. I have doubts and worries.

I think I’ll take a walk and clear my head.

Peace,
Bobby

Doing the solo acoustic mini set between sets…..

Frisco Beach on Cape Hatteras July 2009.

Perspective is a real eye opener. Sometimes, I take for granted the things we do and see.

We have a foreign exchange student from Montenegro. She is the youngest of three girls that have stayed with our family in some form or fashion. Saska is 31, Sanjice is 29 and Jovanna is 17.

They come from a very nice family. They personally know the Prime Minister and all that stuff…Anyhow…getting back to Jovanna.

Hmmm…She is very reserved and only opens up around our family. There is absolutely nothing athletic about her at all. N-O-T-H-I-N-G. There is no teaching her how to surf. Too dangerous. Can she sing? Um, nope. I am polite because I hear her singing when she is happy (Which is often). Ladies and gentlemen; she can’t sing. God bless her pointed little head, even teaching her how to ride a mountain bike hasn’t been easy.

She does speak several languages and can even translate that old Russian in Syrillic if you need it. She is a very applied student and makes straight A’s in all of her classes so far including her AP courses. I have told her that she needs to join some clubs to increase her base of friends at school. Meeting people and making the transition to friendship is difficult for her.

Our trips to The Outer banks and to DC have blown her away. Montenegro is small and they don’t usually take road trips like we do. College life here is very different than their college life.

At the end of the day she tells me all of the neat and unique experiences she has enjoyed with us and that she looks forward to all of the adventures yet to come.

Life is all about the experiences….

Kelly joins us this weekend. I am looking forward to it.

I hope that you and those you love have a wonderful Labor day weekend.

See you on the beach.

Peace,
Bobby

I worked in the lawn and flower beds for two hours after work last night. I don’t mind the high heat and humidity. It comes with the territory. Tonight I’m going over to one of my properties and clearing some overgrowth with a machete after my workout. Believe it or not this is a lot of fun.

You can bank on me jumping in the water afterwards.

Saturday and Sunday? Oh you and I both know I will get my chores done early because we are going to the beach. My Sister is in Frisco this weekend (A village on Hatteras Island) and she will let me know if the surf is up early that morning. If it is, I see myself going down there and spending the night.

Of course if the bay is flat and glassy then I’ll stay home and ride the jetski. I feel like taking a long trip on that thing for some odd reason. Crazy golf cart rides will rule the evening I am sure if I stay home.

Sunday we have some friends coming over to grill some elk meat once we leave the beach. I have never had it and I am looking forward to trying it.

Now that my brother is seperated/divorcing his very cruel wife, we see more and more of him. I think he is coming over with my niece tonight. I do my very best to never say anything negative.
For the sake of honesty she is consumed with anger (just in general) and it has made her a very ugly human being both inside and out. She has let it run unchecked in her life and makes sport of turning it on herself and others. Her anger is an awful curse.

I view my anger as a gift. It motivates me to be a better person. You can harness its energy to do so many positive things. Don’t dwell on it. Recognizing it is 100% of the battle.

See you on the beach. (Hopefully in a good mood).

Oh and for those of you who don’t swim; get on over to the pool and take some lessons already!!!
Sheesh….

Peace,
Bobby

Hmmm…

You know I sit around and chirp from time to time about the things I love and do well. Most folks are inclined to crow about good things in their life and I am no different I suppose.

Ahhh…So then why not talk about the stuff you don’t do so well?

I flat suck at Basketball. I just do. Oh sure I’m a good athlete but my passion for Basketball and desire to play the game ranks right up there with a slug. Want to win? Don’t pick me because I suck.

I will mess with the electrical panels in the house but I don’t like getting jackhammered by voltage when I make a mistake. Yikes!

Alligators? Um, I don’t like them at all. Count me out. I might knock your grandmother out of a wheelchair getting away from those things.

Chickies crying about this or that? I don’t know what to do. The worst is watching my my mom, wife or daughter cry. Why don’t you just nuke me? I don’t know what to say usually. UGH!

Ladies and Gentlemen I cannot rap. Nope. I tried. Several times. Not happening. Same thing holds true with that country twang in an attempt to sing country. Forget it. Neither one of these things are in my blood and musically I believe they are closely related.

Dancing? Oh my God! You and I both know the only reason I”ll consider dancing to begin with is because perhaps I’ll get lucky later with Nurse Ratchet. She likes it. I hate it. Oh, I also suck at it too.

Ever meet a guy who could pick up chicks like a magnet? I’m the antidote for that guy. Let’s just say I am Lerm’s evil anti opposite. The dude has skills. I DO NOT. Hilarious. I have NO SKILL.

I have many flaws. Lots and lots of flaws actually. I am human you know?

I recognize that my friends and family know many if not most of my flaws.

Guess what?

They love me despite my shortcomings….

Not perfect? Who cares?

Peace,

Bobby

Some days I just like to read and comment on other journals as I work through the day. I have three computers and run all kinds of crazy programs all at once while working.

I have a funeral to attend today. I also have to sing. It will be over soon.

On a lighter note I have band practice tonight and that is always so much fun. We are learning 5 new songs tonight.

The law of large numbers tells me that if you have a lot of friends then you will logically lose a few to death. This is simply a part of life. I suffer when they go. I suppose I could be a recluse and not have any friends. That just isn’t my nature.

“Given a long enough time line, the survival rate drops to zero” - Tyler Durden

I journal to disclose my fears, love, grief, joys and humanity. If you met me in 3d you would find me to be active and upbeat. The only thing you miss in the journal is my physical nature. One minute I’m hugging the ladies and the next minute I’m fighting (for sport) with my brother on the living room floor.

You just never know. I’m a dude. This is what we do.

Life is way too short to do a bunch of crap you don’t like. I believe life must be filled to the brim with activities and people you love. Nothing stays the same forever. You have to enjoy each day and prepare/look forward to the next. Some are better than others.

Many times life will give you wonderful surprises on the upside! These are perhaps the most special of all days.

I miss my deceased friends and think about them often.

I love my friends and family so very much.

I look forward to making new friends and learning about your lives…Friends are the family you make for yourself.

Is this a “Southern” thing?

Nope. People are people. To make a friend you must be a friend.

This is universal.

Peace be with you,

Bobby

Who is the first call every time? My best friend of course. She is easily the most fun person I have ever met.

Want to travel? Oh, she loves to travel. I don’t have to ask twice if she wants to join me.

Like sports? Yep, she will play ball, go to the gym, sign up for a run and work circles around you.
Bowling, skiing, Bocce ball, Croquet, Soccer, Field Hockey, Softball, Surfing, almost anything. She can do it all.

Will she help you with the big stuff? Oh yes. She has worked right by my side on every project we have ever done.

Does she love the water? She sure does. Sometimes she cries when we leave the beach and she lives AT the beach.

Music? She is a musician although our musical paths never cross. I admire this about her.

Is she smart? I would say she is smarter than I am.

Is she pretty? To me she is beautiful. Her inner beauty is even more phenomenal in many ways. Once you meet her you will never forget her.

Is she perfect? No. I don’t care either. None of us are perfect.

Are we different? Yes, we are different in many ways yet our goals and values are very similar.

Love is like a plant. It requires lots of sunshine and water in order to live.

My marriage is the single most significant relationship I have ever had. I treat is as such. I remember exactly why I fell for her and I never take that feeling for granted. I let her know it all the time in my actions, words and deeds. I am 45 and so is she. We were born three days apart. She has been my girlfriend since I was 17.

What is the secret?

Look at yourself in the mirror sometime. The answer comes from within.

Just remember Love is the most powerful force in the human existence. Don’t be afraid to harness its energy.

Peace be with you,
Bobby

A pic of me and my beloved at Sweely Estate Winery taken Apr 18th 2009.